"Not Sure"
"I know that you're not tryin' to diss God's word / Trust me that I understand, you're just not sure."
Most Christian music acts like doubt is a sin. They sell you the finish line where everything is perfect. But my testimony didn’t start at the finish line—it started in the dark, with a candle, terrified of the next step.
When I wrote "Not Sure," I wasn't standing on a mountaintop. I was coming out of a psychosis induced by addiction, looking at a Bible and feeling… disconnected. I wanted to believe, but my brain was still rewiring itself from the trauma.
I realized something profound that night...
God isn't intimidated by your questions.
In the second verse, I say:
"Darkness surrounded / I was given a candle / Because he knew how far the next step / I was ready to handle."
If God showed me the whole picture I would have run away. It was too much light for eyes that were used to the dark. He gave me just enough light for one step.
If you are reading this and you feel like a "bad Christian" because you have questions, or you feel like a "failed addict" because you aren't fixed yet...STOP!
You don't have to be "sure." You just have to be willing to take the next step.
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